A blog series on friendship…
This all started with me seeing an old college friend over the weekend. Wow. If that doesn’t make me sound old. Anyways. I’m kinda totally lying.
It didn’t start with that at all. Yeah, I saw an old friend. But if I’m honest, I ALWAYS think about blogging on friendship. It would seem to me that adults aren’t generally very good at making friends, and adults aren’t always very good at teaching kids good friendship skills. Then those kids with poor friendship skills grow up to be adults with poor friendship skills, and the circle goes on.
And yet, friendship is extremely valuable. People with a good group, or “clan” are said to live longer, have better statistics of making it through serious sicknesses, and are said to find more happiness in life. Studies done on areas in the world where larger amounts of the population live to be 100+ years old… guess what they found out? People who live to be super old are have this in common: They are genereally people who have relationships with people who are consistent in their lives. People who know them well and see them often, sometimes even daily. Its part of the answer to increasing longevity. (Also, eating beans. In case you wanted to know.) So we see that friendship is not a little thing.
With friendship being always forefront in my mind, a few things happened in my week to compel me to actually write about friendship and to really take this on as a conversation. First off, I got some time with my Matron of Honor. We don’t often spend time together, just for the heck of it. I don’t really text her and say, “Hey, let’s hang out and watch 90’s movies and eat pizza together this weekend.” You know? But I have been thinking of her and wanted to see her. You know, not because I need to “meet” with her since she is a leader in the church, not to “hash out life details” with her. Not because all her kids are older than mine and I need to figure out what the heck I’m doing in this whole “parenting” thing. I wanted to see her JUST to HANG OUT. Because I love her. So I texted her about hanging out for the heck of it. So we did, and it was… LOVELY. Sometimes, you just need to text a friend and hold out a hand of friendship. You know?
Next, I saw that college friend of mine over the weekend. By some miracle of God, spending time with him and his wife (and now their beautiful baby!) was just as great now as it has ever been. Twelve years, five kids (four for me, one for him), and it felt like nothing in the world had changed. Except now instead of having one friend, I have two! Caz he married that wonderful chic he was in love with. (An extra friend for no extra charge! This how I win at life without even trying. HA!)
Spending time with old friends got my brain spinning about how we build friendships. How friendship changes us as people. How people, as they open their lives up to others, find themselves infused with courage.
I am extremely grateful for the people who have come into my life. It is a beautiful mystery to have people who like you and want to be in your life. Friendship, honestly, just never gets old. But I don’t want to stop at, “Oh, I’m happy I have people in my life.” I want to excel at being a friend. So I’m going to take a few weeks to think about friendship, pray about friendship, and to even go so far as to pick the brains of some outstanding people I know who are winning at being friendly. I have so much I’m thinking through. I hope you’ll hang around and be a part of this conversation.